A Reader Responds

In yesterday’s Reader Mailbag, I gave my unassailable advice to reader S. She has responded to it in the comments.

Hi, I’m S. herself.

You were wrong on this one.  Since I wrote you my (ill-advised?) request for help, K. and I are now dating, crazy about each other, and never been happier.  I was wrong about thinking he was self-destructive; as it turns out, some bad personal stuff happened to him last year that he never told me about, and he had every reason to be unhappy.  Now he’s much different.  Bright, kind, strong.  I never dreamed anything could be this good.

This site is a guilty pleasure for me, and occasionally hilarious, but you folks should know that sometimes real life is very different from this blog.

This blog is where girls go for thrill rides.

Actually, I was not wrong. I recommended you drop all your expectations and just fuck the guy and get it out of the way. You have started doing just that — dropped your expectations (“I was wrong about thinking he was self-destructive”) and smoothed the way for an eventual lay by making excuses for him and downplaying his flaws (“he had every reason to be unhappy”) and telling yourself there is a love connection (“I never dreamed anything could be this good.”) Yes, I’m sure he’s a changed man. He changed long time… in two weeks.

S. wrote me her request for help less than two weeks ago. It seems odd she could go from completely unsure of this guy K. to “dating, crazy about each other, and never been happier” in two weeks time. It sounds like K. said all the right things and cooed love whispers in her ear. His game must be tight. Respect.

But as we will see below, not tight enough to get the bang.

Thanks, commenters, for your advice.

Lemmonex: no, I’m not going to “just fuck him.” I’m too old-fashioned for that. Making out is pretty wonderful, on the other hand.

So you won’t put out but you’ll torture him with makeouts until his balls explode from pressure buildup. Yes, pretty wonderful for you, but for him… let’s just say only a guy with no options would put up with that frigid ice queen treatment for long. Give yourself a pat on the back… you’re dating a beta. Ironically, if you succeed in your mission to break his manly spirit and make him play by your rules, you’ll be more likely to lose interest in him.

as: He is a nice guy to whom I’m attracted, and if things work out I will introduce him to my parents.

Is your mom a MILF? If your niceguy “boyfriend” hasn’t been scrotally drained, you may want to hide her in the basement.

Piece and beaver grease.

ps: Keep us posted.

pps: (I try to help and this is the thanks I get. Do you people know how I bleed for you? Is it so hard to show even a tiny bit of gratitude? I suppose you want to see a grown man drown his sorrows in a vat of Ben&Jerrys Chunky Monkey. You’re all sick, sadistic bastards.)

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