Comment Of The Week: Sexual Self-Control Is A Male Thing

Reader whorefinder posits a theory explaining why, historically, women’s sexuality has been deemed more dangerous than men’s sexuality to societal cohesion:

One thing about bitches in heat is that they really aren’t that used to it.

For all the jokes about men being led around by their dicks, men at least have the experience of being turned on a lot more and for a lot longer than women. And, because of that, how to socially deal with that.

Consequently, when a man is turned on —say, at a strip club— he doesn’t charge the stage and throw a stripper down and fuck her right there, even if he wants to. Fear of the bouncers, arrest, rape charges, etc. are there, but so is the social approbation and, generally, his experiences as a younger man knowing how his sexuality acts and not succumbing to it. This, too, shall pass.

Women, on the other hand, experience lust and turned-on-ness more rarely, and its more fleeting for them. After all, the sexual reproduction is accomplished when men ejaculate, not when females orgasm, so nature made men hornier. This is also why women complain of a mood (for sex) “being broken” by a smell, a phrase, or a sight, while men do not have that happen—because men are built to push through and get the job done.

But because women get less horny, when they do get turned on, and especially turned on well, they have much less control. A smooth player who hits all the right buttons on a girl will have her in a puppy-like state because she doesn’t know how to handle it. It’s at the root of when women say “it just happened”—she was so overwhelmed by unfamiliar instinct that she went on autopilot (almost literally), as she had no experience fighting it.

Hornier women—i.e. more masculine women—-are more in tune with the male mindset because 1) they’re led around by their vaginas more; and 2) they have experience taming their vagina cravings. They don’t act girlish because girlishness is for girls who don’t know what waking up horny every day feels like.

All this is to say that women who are able to deny sex based on some “rules” mentality are thinking instead of feeling, which means they aren’t feeling horny enough to jump on you, which means they aren’t very turned on by you in the first place.

Men have a tiger in their pants. When you have spent your whole post-pubescent life side-by-side with a tiger, you learn how to tame it so it doesn’t get you trouble. You learn to think clearly when it’s breathing down your neck. Women have an elephant in their pants; passive and docile most of the time, content to graze languorously, but when it’s roused there’s no stopping it from a destructive rampage. When her elephant is rampaging, she is helpless to think clearly.

Women only seem like they have more sexual self-control than do men, but that’s because they don’t get tempted nearly as much as men do. If women were as frequently, indiscriminately, instantly and intensely climb-the-walls horny as men are, you’d see them begin acting in some very strange ways that broke all sorts of social taboos. Women, for this reason, cannot empathize with men’s libidinous natures and psychological states. Similarly, men find it difficult to empathize with women’s needs for sexual prudence and deliberation (though men find it less difficult to empathize with women than the other way around, owing to the nature of the sexual market requiring more reality-based thinking from men than from women).

For a perfect demonstration of women’s unfamiliarity with powerful uncontrollable horniness, just watch in wonder at how crazily uninhibited in bed a “good girl” will get with you if she has little prior experience dating charming men like yourself, or dating any men at all. Women in these situations often go into a shaman-like state of complete abandon, shrieking pleasure at the top of their lungs, and unable to wind down until sleep becomes too heavy to fight off. And when they fall in love, they become utterly dependent.

whorefinder is correct, then, to say that any man struggling patiently to close the deal with an overly prudent woman is probably falling short of turning her on sufficiently. A woman who truly craves a man will surrender quicker than she anticipated to her surprisingly powerful lust impulse, and her thinking processes will then be hijacked in service to her emotions, rationalizing the pleasure-seeking actions she’s about to take, rather than turned in service to her arid reason or rules. In contrast, a woman who is able to think clearly in your company is a woman whose vagina remains dry and unperturbed.

To put it another way: You wouldn’t want to date any Rules girl who succeeded at convincing you to obey her rules.

The next post will seem to be a direct contradiction of this post, but it won’t be to those who understand that woman is cursed with dueling reproductive directives. This long duel of the female soul — eternal, unrelenting, stalemated — imbues women with a vague veneer of crazy. It’s what makes women inscrutable to high and low men, and sometimes even to the most perceptive masters of the mind.

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