In seduction, honesty is not the best policy. A man learns from experience to conceal some of what he is thinking because no matter how much a woman says she wants to know his true feelings, she would rather not.
Hiding my opinions from a woman I am trying to bed is a tactical maneuver, not a fear-based beta instinct. There is a difference between bending your opinions to appease the girl and refraining from excessive candor so as not to unnecessarily drive her away. If I think a girl’s hobbies suck, what good does it do me to tell her that? It is not alpha to be so cavalier in your opinions that you shit all over the things she cherishes most.
Women don’t operate like men. A misplaced word or criticism can turn them off instantly. A woman may want to have sex with you after the first fifteen minutes, but her horniness can be easily reversed if you sever the connection with disagreements that go to the heart of how she sees herself. Unless you are a low-testosterone man who won’t mind the long stretches of celibacy resulting from sticking by your principled honesty, deep-seated differences in opinion should only be shared after sex when the possibility of a long term relationship is evident.
Now I don’t advocate lying. There is a middle ground between complete candor and bald-faced lies. Massaging the truth is the best way to describe it. Some may call this manipulation. Is it manipulation if I speak honestly but say it in such a way that my chances of success are maximized? And if that is manipulation, is it wrong?
The fact is, there would be very little hooking up at all if men decided en masse to be totally honest with women. I think men could handle women telling them they only like them for their high status job or their swagger, but could women handle being told by men that dinner was on them only because they think this will buy them a titty fuck? Or that all they can think about when she is blathering on about crystal therapy or her non-profit job is what she looks like naked and what it would be like to make love to her all night long?
Let’s be honest. Honesty falls in the category of those values we all say we want from others, but really don’t.