The Sluttiest Slut In The Whole Slutty World

Randall Parker over at Parapundit sent a link to some social survey data that teases out a few important characteristics of girls who are most likely to slut it up. The results won’t surprise anyone who is a regular reader of this blog.

Urban SWPL chicks are more likely than small town girls to cheat on their husbands. This was (happily) observed two years ago at the Chateau.

Atheists, the nonreligious, and C and E pew warmers are more likely than churchgoing girls to cheat on their husbands. We can deduce, then, that blue city anti-Christian liberals are sluttier than red state Jesus-loving conservatives. Again, the Chateau hosts are happily, and opportunistically, aware of this social dynamic.

Really smart chicks are more likely than dumb chicks to cheat on their husbands. (And a thousand fembot haters caught themselves mid-whine about how only low self esteem dummies would fall for pickup artists. D’oh!) I wonder if this means Jewish girls are the sluttiest girls of them all? And if true, would that then make the fact anti-Semitic? Would it still be anti-Semitic if the positive and empowering feminist definition of slut were invoked?

Real estate agents and lawyers are considerably more likely than teachers and bank tellers to cheat on their husbands. The Chateau knew this was true from simple real life observations nearly three years ago in its popular and notorious post “What A Girl’s Job Tells You“. Excerpts:

Lawyer

Amoral alpha males with vaginas.  Their yin is so deeply buried they spend all their free time (2 hours per week) fantasizing about a powerful dominant man releasing their inner woman.  This is your cue to ratchet up the assholery.  Outside of i-bankers and fashionistas, you will not meet a more materialistic or status-conscious chick than a lawyer.  When she inevitably starts talking about what law school she attended and politicos she knows, put your finger up to her mouth and say “shhh… stop.  from now on we will talk about happy things.  tell me only the good things that come to mind about your childhood.” Most lawyer chicks have large clits which they use to pin you down on the bed.  Making love to a lawyer means facefucking her till she pukes a little.  The gods of karmic retribution will be pleased with this.  Lawyers are always fucking over everyone else so this is your chance to return the favor.  Proceed with great relish.
Sexual Satisfaction Rating:  4/5th erection
Long Term Potential Rating:  don’t be a masochist

[,,,]

Elementary School Teacher

Pure gold.  Put this girl on your short list for long term commitment.  What’s not to love about the elementary school teacher?  Cute, thin (it’s a workout chasing kids all day), ultra feminine, nurturing, selfless, caring, and most importantly blessedly low maintenance due to the nature of her workplace environment sequestering her from the attentions of men.  The best ones teach 1st through 5th grades.  Women who supervise daycare are too toddler-focused and will love the kids more than you.  You will soon tire of her coo-ing at every baby you both pass by.  High school teachers are too stressed out from their job to properly service your manly needs at home.  Don’t bother with college professors unless you think foreplay is listening to an earful of pomo feminist shrillness.
Bonus:  teachers don’t make much money so your financial status will always be higher, guaranteeing a long and healthy relationship.
Sexual Satisfaction Rating:  3/4th erection
Long Term Potential Rating:  hope diamond (she’s not gonna have much opportunity to cheat at work)

It stands to reason that jobs which require a lot of testosterone and assertiveness to succeed in also attract the sluttiest girls. Testosterone is a leading precursor to infidelity. The slutty lawyer cunt with the overgrown clit is no figment of the imagination. She is real, and she is on the prowl. Jobs which surround women with a lot of men, and thus opportunities to cheat, are also a red flag for any beta hubby suspicious of his kid’s paternity. If wifey is a lawyer in an office that is 90% male, the odds she hasn’t taken a ride on the cock carousel are very low.

As an aside, I don’t particularly trust social surveys delving into the sexual habits of Americans because, well, people lie about their sex lives more than any other subject. On the number of partners, women lie down and men lie up. More relevantly, modern women have a skewed interpretation of what exactly constitutes sex. I can’t tell you how many girls have confessed to me that they don’t consider handjobs, blowjobs, or anal love as sex. This cultural definitional change, naturally, will skew social survey data about female sluttiness trends. The GSS does not capture this attitude shift.

Nonetheless, the data do give us a glimpse at sexual attitudes and behaviors. And what it shows is that the Chateau was well ahead of the curve in describing which kinds of women are the biggest sluts. This infamous post gave male readers information on how best to identify which girls are sluts. Female readers responded with a hail of indignation, for who can doubt that the ability to keep their slutty selves secret is a power most women loathe to relinquish, as important as it is subconsciously understood by women that high value men prefer to marry more rather than less chaste girls. The Chateau gates creaked open and permitted access to a dark labyrinth of the female psyche, and the demonesses howled at the light right on cue.

From all the above data, and from additional observations into the habits, behaviors, and phenotypes of slutty girls, we can now construct the perfect prototypical überslut:

She is –

A real estate agent, lawyer, or “creative artist”.

Nonreligious.

Has a high IQ.

Is an Ivy League graduate.

Is a business school or law school graduate.

Lives in the city.

Has a ring finger longer than her index finger.

Has a manjaw, a jutting chin, and/or furry forearms.

Is narcissistic, perfectionist, extroverted and just hot enough to have the option to cheat. (Big chins and manjaws necessitate against having this option.)

Is endlessly sarcastic.

Talks about sex a lot.

Has a lot of travel stories you suspect have key details left out.

Has one giant purple saguaro on her nightstand.

******

There you are, folks. A sexually aggressive, extroverted, narcissistic, high self-esteem, facially prominent, sarcastic, well-traveled, SWPL lifestyle living, overpriced downtown condo owning, atheistic, smart lawyer cunt is your best bet for easy, no muss no fuss sex and your worst bet for marriage. Don’t bother buying this girl flowers; you won’t need to. Staying faithful to such a woman in hopes it will encourage her to uphold her end of the bargain is a sucker’s bet.

Here is what the typical female überslut might look like:

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